The Love of Catherine

Looking into the world of relationships

Baby steps..or not?

Filed under: Uncategorized — ckim90 at 7:50 pm on Sunday, September 18, 2011

A few years back, I was digging through my mom’s closet in search of a bag I could steal for the day when I came upon a large box I’ve never seen before. I honestly hate when my mom goes through my things, so I was a bit hesitant to see what was inside the box but curiosity came over me and I excitedly pulled it out of the closet and threw the cover off to see a stack of envelopes. After reading letter after letter, I realized these were the love letters my dad mailed to my mom when they were dating. Yes! This is the love that I always dreamed of; letters, standing outside the window throwing pebbles, all the Romeo & Juliet type of love.

If my parents were able to experience this kind of love, I was positive that I would be able to do so as well. So I started my journey of finding the love of my life. I truly believed that my other half existed somewhere in the world, waiting to be found.

One day, I was sitting at my desk doing my homework when I heard my brother entering the house with his friends. My brother always introduced me to his friends so like any other day, he knocked on my door and brought his friend in. The moment I saw his friend, I thought I found love. He was tall and handsome. While conversing, I found out that he was an amazing guitar player and his personality was so witty and refreshing. We connected immediately. This was it. He was my other half!

After a month or so of crushing on him, I was sitting at my computer late at night chatting with him when all of a sudden he asked me out. How amazing it was! But wait…what happened to the letters? What happened to the romance? We were sitting in front of our computers on AOL. This isn’t what I expected but I guess we’ll just have to go with it! So that night, I was able to sleep peacefully.

I didn’t have a cellphone at the time so there was no way of contacting him and we lived a bit far away so we didn’t even get to see each other. The following night, we were chatting again when all of a sudden, he told me that he didn’t think things would work out. What? That’s not possible. I thought he was my other half! Without even having a say in it, my first relationship, if we can even call it one, was over.

I obviously failed at my first  24 hour relationship. Was it my fault? Or is it the change in culture that has decreased the amount of romance in everybody? Although my first relationship ended brutally, I still had hope. I truly believed that I would be able to experience the love that my parents were able to experience.



   jenny abeles

September 19, 2011 @ 1:09 PM

Hi Catherine. You followed up your initial romance-filled post with a very interesting anecdote indeed. I love hearing about your mom’s secret love letters and the effect they had on you–a love letter is a powerful token, and–as you suggest–what happens to them as we all become more digitally-focussed with our texts and emails? Can we cherish a text? Tie it with a ribbon and stow it away in a box? I wonder how computers have affected romance in our world?

I’m also curious about your “love at first sight” experience. Apart from your disappointment, what effect did this have on you? What was that “love” based on and what is there to learn about love from this?

Love is such a universal experience, your writing on this subject has great potential to reflect useful notions for all of us. Think about ways to expand outward in your posts from the personal to the universal, so we think not only about you and your quest, but to ourselves…

More lovely writing and story-telling here!


   Steve Mendoza

September 20, 2011 @ 9:44 PM

My first crush that I had failed miserably as well, and it was so hard for me to even find hope.

I had people I liked, and I also had my own share of female enemies (I’ll explain a lot later).

But I do know exactly what you are feeling during that time. I have felt the exact same way.

I’m trying my best here not to give, but it pulls a strain on me that I do feel a bit like I would give up.

I’m scared I wont find anyone.

-Steve Mendoza



September 25, 2011 @ 4:59 PM

It’s funny how much technology has a lot to do with relationships now more than ever before. You never see actual love “letters” on paper anymore.

I always has crushes on my older brother’s friends. I would create my own love stories in my head and they would never happen. When we are young, we don’t realize how naive we are.

The only letters I’ve ever found of my mom’s were divorce papers lol



October 4, 2011 @ 6:32 PM

OMG, I completely agree with Samantha’s comment. It’s true! technology has ruined love. Back then, lovers can only communicate through letters. It’s beautiful. And if they need to meet, they must go to each other’s houses to make the date or mail them a letter. When the date comes, it’s more exciting, more passionate, and more taken into consideration. Now technology, although it did make life a bit easier, dates are often taken advantage off. Sometimes couples text each other so much that when a date comes, they don’t really feel that excited to see each other since they were always in touch 24/7. I don’t know how to explain it. lol

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